It was only a week ago that I first heard the phrase ‘free-range parenting’. I had heard of free-range chickens before, but never the words ‘free-range’ used when describing a parenting philosophy.
Free-range parenting is a style that ultimately allows children more freedom. The idea is that kids should be treated as smart and capable, giving them the space to use problem-solving skills, learn how to make decisions, and be an advocate for themselves without the constant supervision of their parents. This might entail walking to school by themselves, playing at a park, or riding public transportation without an adult present.
Free-range parenting is something of a throwback to the ‘good ole days’ when the kids lived straight out of classic 80’s flicks like Stand by Me or The Goonies, hopping on bikes and riding right into whatever adventures and mishaps (but, of course, still making it home in time for dinner). My own childhood looked more like this (unfortunately sans the treasure hunting Goonies-style): I would walk over to a friend’s house or play at the neighborhood park without constant supervision.
The trend has shifted in recent years, and you seldom see parents allowing their kids that much freedom. Instead, you hear horror stories in the news about all the dangers for children, or hear terms like ‘helicopter parent’ defined as parents who are overly protective of their kids to the point of coddling.
Lenore Skenazy, a mother in New York, has challenged this notion and caused a ruckus in the parenting world by writing an article about how she allowed her nine-year old son to ride the subway by himself. Skenazy received immense backlash and criticism for this parenting choice. From this incident, however, emerged the term and philosophy of ‘free-range parenting’.
Skenazy was lucky she only received criticism, as there have been several other cases of parents charged and prosecuted for letting their children roam free. The story of the Meitiv family, for example, which made the headlines when parents allowed their two children ages 6 and 10 to walk home alone from a park. When the police saw the kids walking unattended, they picked them up, and subsequently charged the parents with child neglect. Another recent incident tells the story of a Missouri mother facing charges because she left her child unattended in the car while she went inside a gas station to pay for gas.
These stories are becoming more frequent, as parents give their kids greater freedom and space. Utah is the first state to take notice and make changes at the judicial level so these parents don’t have to fear prosecution.
Utah state Senator Lincoln Fillmore introduced a “free-range parenting” bill that was recently signed into law. This bill redefined the meaning of ‘child neglect’ now allowing “a child, whose basic needs are met and who is of sufficient age and maturity to avoid harm or unreasonable risk of harm, to engage in independent activities.” This means parents in Utah won’t be charged with neglect if their kids walk home from school, play in a park, or ride public transportation without an adult.
Interestingly, studies have shown that today’s world is actually much safer than it was a few decades ago in the 70’s and 80’s. And, if you’re worried about sending your kids into the world, now with technology you can keep tabs on your kids much more easily – The show Black Mirror recently aired an episode titled “Arkangel” that explored the idea of using technology and how far it might go. Though as Black Mirror episodes go it ended quite horrendously and rather disturbingly. It seems, perhaps, that the writers of Black Mirror might be fans of free-range parenting.
Your style of parenting style is, certainly, a very personal choice. Whether you’re behind the free-range parenting philosophy, the “helicopter parent” lifestyle, or perhaps a combination of both, the hope is that kids will be able to grow up safe, happy, healthy, and with all the skills to successfully navigate adulthood. (Though I’m still figuring out the whole adulting thing myself…) Utah is the first, but it seems likely the push back against overprotecting kids may spread to other states in the near future.
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